[He loves her so fiercely. With everything that's happened to her, she tries very hard not to question it, especially since he's worked so hard to show her she's yet beautiful, yet worthy not just of his love, but in general.]
[Her efforts do not go unnoticed— though her progress makes him no less inclined to say those things. He is honest. These words are but an extension of his heart. Nothing more. Nothing less.]
So you do.
[He chuckles.]
I am no less tempted to show you how deeply. How I would love to hear your sweet voice sing for me…
[There's a moment where she stares at him with unbridled gratitude for everything he's given her, beyond the help of recent days, but certainly for that as well and she kisses him lightly, but without fear.]
Mmm...maybe in a minute.
[She manages to set the food down, but doesn't remove herself from his hold. Not yet anyway. She sighs, smiling cheekily.]
[Nonetheless he sets her down upon the bed with a gentle grace, even as he looms over her to give her another kiss; equally light but less quick to let her go.]
[She can't let things escalate tooo much, but...a few kisses can't hurt. She returns it, kissing his lips over and over lightly, growing comfortable in this position underneath him.]
[On one hand, he knows that if she is saying she wanted to talk... it was likely something that was important to her, at the very least.
On the other... her kisses are impossible to resist. If she is going to keep kissing him then he's going to assume it can wait and accept them eagerly-- and take it even further.
He tugs her against him, groping her ass tight.]
And I want to hear what you have to say-- all of it.
[Her look-- so soft, so loving... it fills him with hesitation.
It would be a simple thing to avoid. Lying would be a waste of time. No lie he told would be mistaken for honesty. He simply wasn't capable. Of course that didn't mean he couldn't simply keep his lips sealed.
When he exhales again, it is with a soft sigh, burying his face into the corner of her neck.]
...I'm better when you're here...
[But the words he utters are no form of avoidance-- even if they could be taken that way. He allows his voice to express a soft vulnerability, even though the words themselves are not particularly revealing. With just that inflection, his voice tells just how difficult it has been without her.]
[She moves from brushing his hair away to holding his face.]
Then I will be here.
[It is not entirely what she wants to hear. She knows she matters to him, but she wants to know of the other people that matter, as well, but hearing him like that...so vulnerable, such an obvious concession...she won't suffer herself to ignore it.
She kisses him gently on his lips, thumb brushing back against his face while the other reaches to lace their fingers together, gently squeezing.]
[He knows he is trying to fill a space he cannot. She is the most important existance in his universe.
Even so, she is not them. Same as she is not Elliel.
Some things, even her presence cannot soothe. But-- it is more bearable with her at his side.]
...it is a bittersweet affair. For them, joyous, yes-- though they had their reservations as well. Naturally I am happy for them. They have earned their happy ending. But I cannot help but feel cheated. Something irreplaceable was taken away from me... and as ever, there is nothing I can do about it. My duty is to stand watch over those who will no doubt come after and support those who are still here.
[As he speaks, she runs her thumb on the back of his hand, their fingers still laced.]
Mm...I understand. I understand completely. I have another brother...we adopted each other here, and I miss him every day. I don't want him to be here, he was so...he wasn't made for this place, but not seeing him or having him...even knowing that he is in a better place, one that he deserves, hurts.
[She lets go of his hand to hold his face in both her hands. This precious gift of a man. And it is upon saying that she remembers that either one of them could be gone from the other's life in an instant, and her hands tighten for a moment.]
That is all we can do, sometimes. Honour those who have left as best we can and watch over those who come anew. And...we can also do our best to be with those we have in the moment for as long as we have them, for as long as we can. To try and not have regrets.
[It may still hurt in the end, in all likelihood, but they can mitigate the pain.]
[She has been here longer than he has. It is no surprise that she would understand. The way she loves people so easily... she's probably mourned more losses than imaginable.
Inside of him there is a deep rooted jealousy that burns. That she would speak to him of another brother-- that she would take another. For all she knew, her true brother was lost to her. Oh... but she had this one. This one she chose.
Perhaps he was a better brother than her own.
...
Every part of him bristles to think that they could be separated. He knows it is true, but he rejects the idea with every fiber of his being. Hates it.
Because he knows she would not be alone. Her lovers would keep her warm. She would mourn but--
Perhaps the space he would leave would be rather small, in the end.]
...I do not intend to falter. My feelings aside, I will continue to look out for them as I always have. What I have to offer for the time I am here is theirs. It is as you say-- that is the best we can do.
[She is so blissfully unaware of all those thoughts, and yet there is one that is, at least, on the same wavelength.]
I...if you were to graduate, I would be happy for you, I would. Anyone who gets out of this place should, but not everything here is always terrible and so...I would miss you so much.
[Her voice falls to a whisper and her hands tighten over his face just a little more, like he is a lifeline.
Asking him not to go is selfish when it wouldn't be his choice anyway, but the way she looks and holds him might as well anyway.]
[She listens, and it does sting for a moment, but she starts to bury it, only for him to continue speaking.]
Ah...
[She's a little speechless.]
Do...you want to be with me that much?
[She doesn't think of the logistics in that moment. how she needs to go back home to fix it, how she wants to see Vivi and everyone else in Amaurot. That Nite wants her so much...]
[On many occasions he would tease her for asking such an obvious uquestion at this point. But this time he does not; golden eyes smiling down at her warm and steady.]
I do.
[He does not care what he would steal her from; the countless possibilities that exist within her future. He would destroy every potential path that could take her away from him.]
Wherever it is I go-- whether my soul is sold or I give myself to another world, I would not be complete without you. There are many things I have simply accepted, whether I like them or not. Being without you... that is one I refuse.
[He chuckles softly, even as he squeezes her tight; running his hands through her hair gently.]
You are sweet. As kind as any person I've ever known.
I cannot say whether or not I truly possess such a thing. However... even if I did... it was made by the hands of others, not unlike any other "thing" one can possess. I do not know that it is so great and important that it is not worth selling-- for the right price.
I think...being here confirms that you must. Souls are currency. I am not certain Hell would bother with us if we did not have them, even if...hm, I am in the same boat, but I suppose I must.
[But she frowns fiercely.]
Even if it was made by someone else, it's yours. And it's valuable. I know a lot of people have made homes for themselves here in Hell and are thriving, but I...
[her frown eases, becoming more thoughtful.]
I don't know, I feel like you're not meant for it...and if...if being together somehow is what you want, I don't think I can stay here either.
[She looks as though she might say more, but she stops.]
Yes, surely it is of some value. Hmhmhm... perhaps in its novelty it is worth that much more. That would be a very sweet irony. Nonetheless, I assure you I would not give it carelessly.
Yours, too, I am certain is a most beautiful thing. And I would not want to see it taken. So I am quite glad to hear that you have other plans in mind.
Being together is exactly what I desire. I will go wherever you wish to go.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
MIHI???? WHY U UP
Mmm...you're so greedy.
[She kisses his cheek, proof that she minds that. Clearly.]
TO TAG YOU CLEARLY!!!
[He holds her tighter to him and carries her to his room.]
omg well no complaints
[He loves her so fiercely. With everything that's happened to her, she tries very hard not to question it, especially since he's worked so hard to show her she's yet beautiful, yet worthy not just of his love, but in general.]
I know.
[It bears repeating.]
that’s right you better not
So you do.
[He chuckles.]
I am no less tempted to show you how deeply. How I would love to hear your sweet voice sing for me…
oh noes mihi so powerful whatever shall i do
Mmm...maybe in a minute.
[She manages to set the food down, but doesn't remove herself from his hold. Not yet anyway. She sighs, smiling cheekily.]
I suppose you should set me down on the bed.
surrender
[Nonetheless he sets her down upon the bed with a gentle grace, even as he looms over her to give her another kiss; equally light but less quick to let her go.]
i surrender~
[She can't let things escalate tooo much, but...a few kisses can't hurt. She returns it, kissing his lips over and over lightly, growing comfortable in this position underneath him.]
huhuhuhu
[He will take those kisses and then some. All that he is offered and all that he can have.]
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Nite--I--wanted to--speak to you.
[But she is also kissing him so that makes it harder.]
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On the other... her kisses are impossible to resist. If she is going to keep kissing him then he's going to assume it can wait and accept them eagerly-- and take it even further.
He tugs her against him, groping her ass tight.]
And I want to hear what you have to say-- all of it.
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Mmm...well, I just wanted to know how you were doing.
[She reaches up, to brush some hair away from his face, to look at him kindly.]
Now that they're gone.
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It would be a simple thing to avoid. Lying would be a waste of time. No lie he told would be mistaken for honesty. He simply wasn't capable. Of course that didn't mean he couldn't simply keep his lips sealed.
When he exhales again, it is with a soft sigh, burying his face into the corner of her neck.]
...I'm better when you're here...
[But the words he utters are no form of avoidance-- even if they could be taken that way. He allows his voice to express a soft vulnerability, even though the words themselves are not particularly revealing. With just that inflection, his voice tells just how difficult it has been without her.]
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Then I will be here.
[It is not entirely what she wants to hear. She knows she matters to him, but she wants to know of the other people that matter, as well, but hearing him like that...so vulnerable, such an obvious concession...she won't suffer herself to ignore it.
She kisses him gently on his lips, thumb brushing back against his face while the other reaches to lace their fingers together, gently squeezing.]
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Even so, she is not them. Same as she is not Elliel.
Some things, even her presence cannot soothe. But-- it is more bearable with her at his side.]
...it is a bittersweet affair. For them, joyous, yes-- though they had their reservations as well. Naturally I am happy for them. They have earned their happy ending. But I cannot help but feel cheated. Something irreplaceable was taken away from me... and as ever, there is nothing I can do about it. My duty is to stand watch over those who will no doubt come after and support those who are still here.
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Mm...I understand. I understand completely. I have another brother...we adopted each other here, and I miss him every day. I don't want him to be here, he was so...he wasn't made for this place, but not seeing him or having him...even knowing that he is in a better place, one that he deserves, hurts.
[She lets go of his hand to hold his face in both her hands. This precious gift of a man. And it is upon saying that she remembers that either one of them could be gone from the other's life in an instant, and her hands tighten for a moment.]
That is all we can do, sometimes. Honour those who have left as best we can and watch over those who come anew. And...we can also do our best to be with those we have in the moment for as long as we have them, for as long as we can. To try and not have regrets.
[It may still hurt in the end, in all likelihood, but they can mitigate the pain.]
no subject
Inside of him there is a deep rooted jealousy that burns. That she would speak to him of another brother-- that she would take another. For all she knew, her true brother was lost to her. Oh... but she had this one. This one she chose.
Perhaps he was a better brother than her own.
...
Every part of him bristles to think that they could be separated. He knows it is true, but he rejects the idea with every fiber of his being. Hates it.
Because he knows she would not be alone. Her lovers would keep her warm. She would mourn but--
Perhaps the space he would leave would be rather small, in the end.]
...I do not intend to falter. My feelings aside, I will continue to look out for them as I always have. What I have to offer for the time I am here is theirs. It is as you say-- that is the best we can do.
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[She is so blissfully unaware of all those thoughts, and yet there is one that is, at least, on the same wavelength.]
I...if you were to graduate, I would be happy for you, I would. Anyone who gets out of this place should, but not everything here is always terrible and so...I would miss you so much.
[Her voice falls to a whisper and her hands tighten over his face just a little more, like he is a lifeline.
Asking him not to go is selfish when it wouldn't be his choice anyway, but the way she looks and holds him might as well anyway.]
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[Which seems like a cruel admittance, in the face of her obvious desire to cling to him. However, he makes it clear not even seconds later.]
But they would in turn have to accept that no wish of mine could they grant if they could not allow me to take you with me.
[He holds her to him. There is a calm assurance in his grip. He does not have to cling desperately. He in confident in this.]
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Ah...
[She's a little speechless.]
Do...you want to be with me that much?
[She doesn't think of the logistics in that moment. how she needs to go back home to fix it, how she wants to see Vivi and everyone else in Amaurot. That Nite wants her so much...]
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I do.
[He does not care what he would steal her from; the countless possibilities that exist within her future. He would destroy every potential path that could take her away from him.]
Wherever it is I go-- whether my soul is sold or I give myself to another world, I would not be complete without you. There are many things I have simply accepted, whether I like them or not. Being without you... that is one I refuse.
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[She panics for a moment.]
It may be yours, and so you can ignore me, but please, your soul is so important. Please don't sell it.
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[He chuckles softly, even as he squeezes her tight; running his hands through her hair gently.]
You are sweet. As kind as any person I've ever known.
I cannot say whether or not I truly possess such a thing. However... even if I did... it was made by the hands of others, not unlike any other "thing" one can possess. I do not know that it is so great and important that it is not worth selling-- for the right price.
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[But she frowns fiercely.]
Even if it was made by someone else, it's yours. And it's valuable. I know a lot of people have made homes for themselves here in Hell and are thriving, but I...
[her frown eases, becoming more thoughtful.]
I don't know, I feel like you're not meant for it...and if...if being together somehow is what you want, I don't think I can stay here either.
[She looks as though she might say more, but she stops.]
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Yours, too, I am certain is a most beautiful thing. And I would not want to see it taken. So I am quite glad to hear that you have other plans in mind.
Being together is exactly what I desire. I will go wherever you wish to go.
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[She has plans, of course, but he isn't asking about them, really, so she won't bore him with the details.
like the details of his own future but boring details nonetheless. Instead she wraps her arms around him.]
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